I am a master student and studying abroad and mainly doing a research, actually I am not really interested in this research thing, I was looking for scholarship for 3 years to finally be able to study abroad, this research program is a very rare chance for me but I took it to make my parents happy (they really demanded me about this) also it's a form of my worship to Allah even though I dont really like it. I know it's going to be a hard journey for me but Im really sure that Allah is gonna help me because my niyyah is good but as time goes by, I feel so depressed, I am almost crying everyday because i dont think i am capable of doing this research. Moreover it's the first time for me living abroad, I find it's so hard for me to discipline myself in studying also in my ibadah, I often hate myself for not being able to handle these two things well. I often make mistakes such as procrastinating (my study also my ibadah), also I cant keep up a consistent habit of reading quran daily. I often cry in regret but then I repeat the same mistakes. In my heart, I really want to do it but it feels like something is blocking me and this happens every single time, I do make dua, I do fast, but the mistakes happen again and again now a thought of "Maybe Allah hates me" "Why Allah doesn't let me to become better" "Why is it hard to become pious" "I really want to enter Jannah, but with this kind of attitude, am I able to?" "Maybe this is a sign of Allah that I cant enter Jannah?" often comes to my mind, and I begin to hate myself even more, I feel like I want to give up, these days I start to stay in my room all day long, not going to school, only sleep, pray and eat. What should I do?

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1- Don’t ever lose hope from Allah. When you feel down, remember that He is the manager of the entire universe and he will help you. Don’t judge your future. You don’t know what Allah has in store for you. And don’t be too hard on yourself. Sometimes the devil whispers to us to be hard on ourselves so we give up. You have the best and most merciful Lord.

2- Try to focus on quality, not quantity. Speak to Allah for a few minutes and pour your heart out. Fall into sujud for 2 minutes and with a deep break thank Allah. Stand on your feet and read the Qur’an for 2-3 minutes. This helps a lot.

3- I recommend these Du’as or A’mal:

1- Betore sleeping, say 100 times لا اله الا الله (la ilaha illa allah) and take a deep breath each time

2- Read this Du’a:

https://duas.mobi/amp/dua/worries

‎3- Put the Qur’an on your heart and recite verse 82 of Sura al-Israa:
‎وَنُنَزِّلُ مِنَ الْقُرْآنِ مَا هُوَ شِفَاءٌ وَرَحْمَةٌ لِّلْمُؤْمِنِينَ

4- Read this Dua daily:
https://www.duas.org/Amn.htm

5- If you can, everyday pray 2 rak’as like the morning prayer, then when done gift it to Imam Mahdi. Say O Allah I offer this prayer as a gift to Imam Mahdi. Then talk to Imam Zaman and ask him to help you with this situation. This prayer is very effective

6- After the morning prayer, but your hand on your heart and say 70 times يا فتاح (ya fatta7), which means you are asking Allah to open for you a new path