1- Yes you have an obligation to he a source or guidance for them.
2- You must use effective ways of disciplining them (not physical hitting). Come up with creative ways to discipline them.
3- When it comes listening to music, have a conversation with them. Show them why music is not healthy. Remind them that musicians and singers have the highest rates of suicide. Why? They are rich and famous, so what’s the problem? It’s because music/singing has a negative long-term impact that on our spirituality and psychological wellbeing. This is one reason why it’s haram. So share with them such points.