When I married my husband, I noticed that he was addicted to pornography. I thought with all my beauty I can make him quit. Every time we have sex he ask me to watch with him and he have difficulty to be active sexually and he blame me. I used to watch with him but I feel guilty so I quit. Then he ask me to talk about relatives from my family who are not religious and he want me to imagine they are having sex with me and when I told him it’s haram I don’t want to do so he said that the person is drunk it’s ok to talk about him . Every time I talk to him that this is haram and I am able to help him he get angry and threatening me that he will make my life miserable because I am not doing what makes him happy… I am tired and desperate and I am not going to do this again in the wrong way ( enough is enough). Please help me .

Some recommendations:

1- Yes avoid seeing that with him. Be firm with him and tell him you will not sin because of his desires. This is a red line and won’t cross it anymore. So be firm with in hopes of him taking it more seriously.

2- Try to get him to see a therapist. This is an addiction and it does require therapy. Encourage him, but don’t sound like you are lecturing him or giving him orders because he might refuse. Be gentle and kind. Many times therapy works.

I also recommend you read the following:

https://www.marriage.com/advice/mental-health/dealing-with-husband-porn-addiction/

3- Try to distract him with an activity that he likes. When you sense he wants to watch, see if you can distract him. Be creative and tell him instead of watching that, I’ll play a role for you (it might work). He might need new things to excite him.

4- Ask Allah to guide him. Read this Du’a daily:

https://www.duas.org/Amn.htm

5- When he is in a good, normal and understanding state, have a kind conversation with him. Tell him the way he compares you is very hurtful and insulting. Ask him, “Are you happy insulting me every time?” Let he know how serious his behavior is. But do this when he is in a good state and willing to listen.

May Allah guide him.