I am a girl which divorce with my husband.and has been married long Time. Is it permissible for me to practice to the bad habit to not fall i other sin or get other problems because i didnt find any one to have mutaa with. So i dont have any other choice then practicing the secret habit. I follow Sayed alsistani bit Sayed fadlallah alows it. Can i follow him in this matter?

No you cannot.