I have a question regarding my marriage and its situation. Alhamdullilah, my wife is a Muslim, practices prayer, wears the hijab and performs her religious bonds.

However, she does this with the absence of real intention and spirituality. She does not understand much and is influenced by the Western view of things.

During this year, she has opposed Islam more than she has tried to understand or see the positive in our religion. I have tried to awaken her to the good but I feel that I have lost the battle in the test with my patience and anger several times. She can be very provocative in things she says about Islam and it hurts me. This has been discussed several times until I have stepped down on it and tried to run my own race but it affects me mainly spiritually but also in my way of being towards her.

I come from a religious home and try to achieve spiritual perfection and live my life in God’s way but her way of thinking and way of life bothers me. I love her because she has a good heart and I know she has the potential to become an exceptional Muslim but it is Allah swt who guides. What do I do in such a situation?

1- Continue to be patient. This is one of your trials in life. Don’t take it personal. Allah is monitoring your performance, and for His sake stay positive and patient. Always remember how the Prophet (s) and Imam (a) had to be patient in such situations.

2- The key to such challenges is education. Find effective ways to answer her misconceptions. Don’t blame her, as there is a lot of confusion these days. Many Muslims commit wrong acts in the name of Islam, and this ruins the image of Muslims. If she criticizes something Muslims are doing, then she may be right. Acknowledge her critique. If she is objecting to the Qur’an or the Ahlulbayt, tell her let’s academically discuss this and find answer. Sometimes you’ll have to do lots of research to answer the misconception. Sometimes you’ll have to ask a scholar. If her misconceptions are addressed in a logical way, she should accept.